Everyone knows otou-san is actually ghostlightning, since ghostlightning is now otou-san!

I did some sleuth work—namely, I went into WRL‘s admin panel using digiboy’s account—and I found the following draft (DRAFT!) in the ancient fucker’s post queue.

Proof positive.

This is all part of a ghastly plan!

In early February, ghostlightning will announce the next meatspace get-together for the FAB. lelangir, for whatever reason (probably not in the cloud, hidden deep in ghostlightning’s personal files), will be on the island, and he’ll join them.

Don’t join them, lelangir!

It’s a trap!

You know what they say about self-fulfilling prophecy?

Let’s face it: Baka-Raptor does it better than I.

Funny thing is that this past weekend, I was Baka-Raptor. Long story, and one I don’t think I’ll tell here. If I start talking about this particular group of my meatspace friends, I may end up exposing various embarrassing stories about anime conventions and the dreams of jizzing on men’s faces that are the stuff of such conventions. What? You don’t know what I’m talking about?

Clearly, you have never been to a convention.

ANYWAY—I come here to deliver some words. I know for a fact that my friends, being the drillsluts they are, enjoy exaggeration and hyperbole and various other redundant nouns all meaning the same thing. The word “epic” is rampant in their vocabulary. This is to say that I have a hard time trusting them. Me? A million fans? Last I checked, though the aniblogosphere had grown considerably, a million was still pushing it. And that’s presupposing that the entire sphere likes me.

But, despite all my True Knowledge, despite knowing that my friends exaggerate, I am posting here: there are no millions at the RSS teat, but I know there are at least five of you out there waiting with bated fingertips for my metaphor-mixing magics.

With a respectful nod toward those who would rather see me never stir my grave, I shall now announce my intentions:

I, loliknowimtsundere, shall henceforth return to posting on ¬.Q.

This is a new year’s resolution, bitches, so you know it’s true. Bitches.

Toodles!

Damn. What a manly man.

I continue to be very pleased with Sixten’s work.

If any of you are as pleased as I am, feel free to help fund this artwork.

Obviously someone has to fail the cut. TJ, Omo, SDB with his cane, Crusader, BigN, Kuro, Evirus, Aroduc, Zyl and his brother, John and Zepy the newsmen — all went under the knife.

Well, for one thing, Omo is definitely in the game (receiving lots of mutated-clit-penetration from Owen). For another, I’ll say this: now that character art is in the picture, the overhead for adding characters has increased dramatically. If I want to add a character, I need to charge Sixten—onto whom I have already piled work—with the character’s artwork.

That said, I can find some outside sources of help.

Otou-san, for instance, has volunteered to make me a ghostlightning.

And some characters don’t need amazing character art. TJ won’t be appearing in my game, but I intend to make use of RIUVA‘s mascot: Tripeman. I hereby humbly request permission of the RIUVA staff. If it’s denied, I will bear Tripeman’s children and bring lawsuits against Jason Miao for removing RIUVA from Blogsuki in 2006 (in all honesty, its largest popularity bid to date), as that obviously will have led directly to my bearing of Tripeman’s tripenile mangobat children. If not explicitly denied, it will be taken for granted.

Man, I’m on a roll with the funniehz.

He lost his job, he went through a semester of college. He started two fuckin websites.

His PR guy turned out to be a user, a cheater, and now he’s going through a trademark battle. All you people care about is….. readers and making money off of him.

HE’S A FOXGIRL! What you don’t realize is that lolikit is making you all this money and all you do is write a bunch of crap about him.

He hasn’t performed in ‘sphere in months. His blog is called “finally” for a reason because all you people want is immediate gratification!

LEAVE HIM ALONE! You are lucky he even wrote for you BASTARDS! LEAVE LOLIKIT ALONE!…..Please.

ghostlightning talked about learnedness and said if lolikit had panache he would’ve pulled it off no matter what.

Speaking of learnedness, when is it learned to publicly bash someone who is going through a hard time.

Leave lolikit Alone Please…. !
Leave Dr. lolikitsune alone!…right now!….I mean it.!

Anyone that has a problem with him you deal with me, because he is not well right now.

LEAVE HIM ALONE!

.lolikappa

lelangir here. I had to drag lolikappa away from the keyboard just now… he was getting a bit too emotional. My fingers are wet and sticky now.

…

From lolikappa’s tears, you dolts!

Anyway. It’s like Madame lolikappa quacked: leave lolikit alone. It’s hard enough dealing with the ungrateful bitch; it’s even worse if we have to deal with his detractors as well. Thanks, and good night.

Jim, cut please.

What? Mr. Crocker is outside? He wants his royalty payments? … how the fuck did he find out we were using his script? Shit! Look, Jim, get out the guns. Get out the fucking guns! It’s us or him, and I’m not going without a fight.

What? We could get out of this mess by throwing lolikit’s carcass to Crocker?

Guess the fans won’t be seeing anymore of the doctor…

[canned introduction] Maria-sama ga Miteru: a show about disgustingly rich girls attending a private school that at once shields them from the harshness of reality and subjects them to the darkest, most horrific thing a girl could go through: romantic friendship with other girls! [/canned introduction]

As DiGiKerot pointed out, there’s a lot wrong with this new season of Maria-sama ga Miteru. This isn’t limited to the OP song change, or to the running in the OP sequence. This episode sees the *gasp* introduction of apparently heterosexual men! In my Hanadera Academy? Obviously it’s more likely than I thought—I would have said the chances were 0%.

Spiral power? “Your sexy lesbian is a sexy lesbian that can pierce the gay man’s gayness?” I don’t even know!

Anyway, this episode sees us approximately one year after the events in episode one of season one. The school festival is coming up, and Lillian Jougakuen’s Yamayurikai is once more holding a play. Once more, the boys from sister gay school Hanadera Gakuen are participating. Once more, there’s some tall, dark, and bishoujo girl bitch who hates men and wants out. Once more, Yumi is given the task of making everything work out.

By the way, Kanako. You want Yumi to remain an angel?

Protip: People die when they’re killed.

Crazy Sachiko, in classic Crazy Sachiko style, informs the actors that the girls and boys will be switching roles. Well, she’s gotten better about gender issues in the last year (remember her moaning about how evil men were?), but this kind of blunt trolling isn’t very attractive. At first Yumi is displeased with her onee-sama’s decision, but then she decides to take it like a good little walking vagina when said onee-sama melts her with her eyes.

Shirukii is also on board with Sachiko’s “meaningful” expressions.

“Rape is imminent.”

In between the Yamayurikai practicing the play and Shimako training her new dog, Yumi has some flashbacks of when she became Crazy Sachiko’s petite soeur. We get some nice piano version of Pastel Pure that almost makes up for the new OP, and… Yoshino suggests that Yumi have a nice anniversary with her onee-sama. I’m starting to see eye-to-eye with IcyStorm here; Yoshino rocks. “Nice anniversary?” Roses, chocolates, a fancy dinner, and a hotel room.

The fanfiction writes itself!

In any event, Crazy Sachiko clearly remembers what day is coming up. She’s got her rape mask on.

Later on, Yumi and Touko are having some problems with their relationship. Thankfully Yumi has learned the lessons taught by Rainy Blue and confronts Touko directly, making a big fuss in front of the Yamayurikai’s sex chapel.

As the school watches in horror, Yumi trills “Ano (Tou)ko wo Rape.”

Now that Maria-sama ga Miteru is current again, I should really do some YFR fic of it, huh?

The stage was set. The metools painted a rainbow over Lillian’s entryway and the Yamayurikai took to the sky in kaiawase formation. Who will profit? Who will get sexxings? Who will make my next blog post funny? So many questions, and a whole another week until episode two…

(The emo girl was emo, but such is the lot in life for those who fall in love with DEAD PEOPLE WHO WERE KILLED. OH EM GEE.)

Fuck Yesssssssssss

Toward the end of the episode, we are informed that Rosa Gigantea is coming back for the school festival. The possibilities are endless. Personally, I’m hoping for the “Sei surprise-sexes Yumi while Yumi is waiting for Sachiko to meet her for their after-festival anniversary-celebratory make-out session” route. Other lovely possibilities include a threesome, an overly-dramatic scene with humongous sexual tension, and a tennis match.

Other coverage by:
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Maria-sama ga Miteru: a show about disgustingly rich girls attending a private school that at once shields them from the harshness of reality and subjects them to the darkest, most horrific thing a girl could go through: romantic friendship with other girls! Maybe I’m a lesbian, by Yuki Seto, on sale at doujin markets near you.

I don’t like the new OP song but that’s just because I’m a stickler for tradition. When Undine came on in Episode 26 of Aria the Natural, I came fucktons of omobuckets. When they got rid of Pastel Pure, I cried more rivers than Noe can throw chickens into. Other thoughts on the OP include, but are not limited to:

• “the cake is lie!”
• “magical girl lyrical fukuzawa?!”
• “needs moar Rosa Gigantea (and not the Shimako variety)”
• “FUCK YES FUCK YES FUCK YES”
• “キター！”

Fuck yes fuck yes Crazy Sachiko is back!!

The second best character Of All Time is Ogasawara Sachiko, AKA “Crazy Sachiko” as dubbed by my senpai and hero, Lovely Kitsune. I say second best because Fukuzawa Yumi (ribbons, funny faces) is younger, and thusly a more acceptable lust-target. Fuck yeah lolis.

Back to Sachiko… why is she so awesome? Nobody knows. All anyone knows is that she just is.

I mean, shit man. She has a “Sa” in her name (さ). Look at that mother-fucker right there. Where have you seen that before? I’ll tell you the fuck where. Remember this guy? Shit yeah you remember that guy. Coincidence? I think not. Sa-chan does not forgive and Sa-chan does not forget. Sa-chan is a psychobitch; expect to not go on dates with her. Did I mention she likes tea? Fuck.

It’s like a damn waterfall down there when I think of her, SHIT.

- question for the peanut gallery: if one can “come harder than omo,” can one “come down more gracefully than IcyStorm” (who orgasms while watching anime approximately once per episode per open IM window yet still functions in society)? -

Sorry for getting derailed. At least “Sachiko” is a better name than “Darry” and all that. Oh and her nose is more sexual. But I digress… back to the episode.

Waitaminute…

I’m going to go download a different version of the episode once my eyes stop being the new waterfall.

In this post I track the development of a meme. I may sound theoretical and profound, but the entire framework of this exercise is only based on an excerpt from this guide to some fruity way to live life at a higher level.

The excerpt:

6. Like all things, memes fit better with some things than others. Some memes naturally fit better in people’s minds. Some memes naturally fit better with other memes. When a group of memes fit well together and pull the strings of someone’s mouth and vocal cords so that they pass them on to others, a new, self-replicating thing gets created. The new thing is called a memeplex.

Self-replication is the most powerful force in the universe. One person tells two, two tell four, four tell eight, and pretty soon the whole universe is full of people sharing the memeplex.

Sometimes a self-replicating memeplex makes a mistake in copying itself. The memeplex with a mistake in it will either be better, worse, or the same at making copies of itself. If it’s better soon there will be more copies of the new memeplex than the old in the universe.

The only way for a new idea to gain acceptance is by a series of copying mistakes that turn out to be better after all.

And,

8. Every new idea we think of immediately becomes transformed by copying mistakes that change it into something that is better at making copies of itself after all. A key part of the idea may be sacrificed to something better for copying.

The only control we have over the spread of our ideas is in making them as resistant to copying mistakes as possible.

Okay, so let’s pretend that the quotes above are actually true. Now let’s look at this meme that I’ve been following, and have used in a few occasions:

“coming harder than omo”

It contains the ff. elements:

• An orgasm (the objective of most sexual activities)
• Omo (the blogger from the Omonomono blog)

The context for the meme developing finds its genesis in the comments section of this post on Owen’s Cruel Angel Theses blog, which accused omo of being a poseur for playing games and watching anime raw (unsubbed). Big drama in the comments section. Lelangir caught on and gave us this:

See the full comic here. Epic aniblogger metacomedy is epic. The statement actually reads “I already came.” However, the elements are the same: 1. Orgasm, 2. Omo. This gets copied, in sequence, several times:

1. 21stcenturydigital boy, no stranger to aniblogger metasex (lelangir documents his tryst with Omisyth here) posted some pornographic Toradora! fanfic which elicited a comment from lelangir himself:

lelangir Says:
December 15, 2008 at 8:21 PM

I came harder than omo.

2. These came out on the same day.

1st example:

1. Everyone came harder than omo.

   ghostlightning — 12/16/08 @ 5:43 am | #Link | Reply

2. Have you Come Harder Than Omo Yet?

   lelangir — 12/16/08 @ 6:13 am | #Link | Reply

3. @ghostlightning: best aniblog meme to date, gotta thank all the good folks involved for that.

   @lelangir: I’m going to have to find some way of putting that into KYOUSORA.COM as a tagline or something. It’s too genius.

   lolikitsune — 12/16/08 @ 7:14 am | #Link | Reply

2nd example:

ghostlightning Says:
December 16, 2008 at 9:10 PM

MOAR porn. I didn’t go where you went with Ryuji and Taiga, but you know I boned the shit out of Kinon.

Mix anime characters and add bloggers into it. That’ll mess things up quite nicely and everyone can come harder than omo.

Now it can be argued that the repeaters of the meme are forcing it. It doesn’t matter for the purposes of this post that the meme is forced. Looking back at the fruity guide to meme development: in copying the proto-meme, we were all doing it wrong. It is mistakes like this that stick. We now end up with a meme “coming harder than omo” that means what exactly? Not quite sure yet, but I’m very interested to find out.

Dr. lolikit sez:

If we apply lolikitean cryptology to “came harder than omo,” well, we come harder than omo. And because I’m a practicer of schadenfaggen, I don’t intend to share that with all of you. Gweheheh.

For now… go stand in the hallway.

P.S. Here’s to looking at a small blue bird, kid.

Madame lolikappa moans:

Furthermore, we are already beginning to see the way the meme is evolving. Originally it only applied to single people coming harder than omo, but is now increasing in number, spreading to meta-omogasmic aniblogger orgies. Clearly, the meme is well on its way to self-sufficiency, as it strives to find the form of maximum repetition. By switching to a multi-aniblogger mode, it broadens its potential contextuality; anibloggers can refer to entire teamblogs of anibloggers coming harder than omo simultaneously, in a single instance of the meme.

In conclusion, fuck you all, you’re all just goddamn membots, completely co-opted by the meta. You’re one epicly stupid meme away from being memeoids. Watch your asses.

Comrade ghostlightning Re-claims, In Conclusion:

Had to be done, after such an inconclusive attempt at a conclusion. That said, lolikappa’s use of a maho shoujo wand and a dance sequence turning all of you into memecha titillates me into hoping for another memetic neon genesis. See what we did here! In tracking the development of a forced meme we’re forcing an entirely new one! I think I just came harder than omo. This post is omosexual.

Yet these hands will never know KIRA~☆

Kaioshin Sama of internet infamy (mostly due to his trollish appearance, which in turn is mostly due to the fact that he has taste and a brain) has issued a challenge to me in the comments of one of RABURI RABURI ghostlightning-chan’s suteki My Hometown-style hippie anti-war pro-love posts. **I move away from the mic to breathe in** The post had been about how people shouldn’t mindlessly hate things, and I had sort of “derailed” (har har) the comments by my introducing my belief that love should be justified just as much as hatred, and that people should always be able to back up their evaluations of shows (and studios).

While we were on the topic of thinking and challenging oneself to be more critical, Kaioshin said:

And if you are looking for a challenge I have one for you. Find me something good that Jason Miao did in terms of blogging……..ever. I have a feeling that I’ve sent you on a wild goose chase, but this could prove interesting nonetheless.

I could point at the sky walls of this blog and yell “Who the hell do you think I am?!” but, as some shrewd observers might observe, the Jason Miao love evident on this site is merely high-level mendacity in its most convoluted form. I have no love for Jason Miao. I am not his biggest fanboy. I cannot point at his forced memes and say “BEHOLD!” while crushing Kaioshin’s challenge in his face.

Two drills, of hand and tail combined—the unison of Vindication, Loli-Kitsu!!

Well, I could. But shouldn’t there be some limit to how sarcastic I can be?

Having decided to take Kaioshin’s challenge seriously, I shall now present unto the aniblogosphere the two and a half good things Jason Miao has done “in terms of blogging,” which I take to mean both “behavior helpful to anibloggers” and “spectacularly legendary blog posts that stimulate the ‘sphere.”

2.5 – Jason Miao liberated Sixten

Were it not for Jason Miao, aniblogosphere illustrator-commenter extraordinaire Sixten would not be the appreciable source of lulz he currently is. Yes, in order to unleash Sixten’s Miao Diary upon the world Jason first had to indenture the poor guy and give him one hell of a complex. Check out this quote:

I am not taking commissions right now, except from family members or Jason Miao (who can always get work from me for free if they ask nicely). – Sixten, Artists are cheap

My interpretation? This guy is whipped.

In any event, it is fact that Sixten was bound to Jason and it is fact that Jason set him free. This is perhaps the best thing Jason has done character-wise; it reflects well on him. I wouldn’t say it’s the best thing he’s done in terms of blogging (hence this point only being ranked #2.5), but it’s pretty good. The Sixten we know today is breaking people everywhere while producing and sharing enjoyable artwork. He’s a positive force in the aniblogosphere, using his art to comment on developments in the community.

It’s good to have the present-day Sixten, and for that, I thank Jason Miao.

1.5 – Jason Miao ran Blogsuki horribly

Because Jason was an elitist prick and Blogsuki was nothing more than Jason Miao’s personal feed reader masquerading as a service to the aniblogocircle, there was room for Hung to come on stage, create Animeなの, and weave a basket from the lonely reeds.

Had Jason run Blogsuki well, the aniblogosphere would have evolved very differently. It’s a good thing he fucked up.

What? “How did he fuck up,” you ask?

Well, riddle me this. Can you load Blogsuki? Fuck off.

It’s good to have the present-day ‘sphere, and for that, I thank Jason Miao.

0.5 – Jason Miao is the aniblogosphere’s Virgin Mary

I always pin my genesis as an aniblogger on Fred Gallagher, because one of his Megatokyo rants got me to watch AIR, and that was around the time I was a regular poster on the AnimeSuki forums, through which I encountered Lovely Kitsune. And this is with good reason, for were it not for Lovely Kitsune I would have no idea what anime blogs are. He was also the one to introduce me to blogrolls (I remember he hated bluemist for placing him on his blogroll) and AIM blocks (I hero-worshipped him because I didn’t know better).

From my first post regarding the 2008 Anime Blog Awards:

Lovely Kitsune blogged epic on AIR, and it’s arguable that without him I would not have started anime blogging, and that without that, ANO’s IRC channel would have never been created, and that without that, the ANO community might never have come together, and well… the possibilities run wild from there. But basically, Jason Miao would still run the aniblogosphere.

But all that said, Lovely Kitsune merely gave me awareness. The one who propelled me into creating “notdotq, seriously!” and the lolikitsune persona was none other than Jason Miao. Thanks to his hard work creating this post, singularity was avoided and the present we know is the true and correct present.

I’ll have you notice a few things about this post of his: first, it’s tongue-in-cheek, second, it’s funny, and third, it’s mostly useful. Unbelievable, right? I mean, this is Jason Miao we’re talking about!

… it’s high time I check my quality rating again.

But I digress! Back on the topic of hand, that post got me to begin blogging anime. Now, I ask that you look around you. Were it not for me, would Animeなの’s community have developed as it did? Take a moment to chew on that one. Would Dr. Japes and Hinano be getting married? Would Os have cycled through four team blogs or would he have given up when his friends in KonOSono bailed on him? Would Owen have ever begun blogging? Would he have formed the ABC? Would I have met Author and Sixten? Would I be making a crappy visual novel?

THAT would not have been formed.
Riex would not have joined THAT.
Riex would not have been unhappy with THAT.
Riex would not have launched Oi, Hayaku!
ghostlightning would not have started his blog.

All these “what ifs” build on each other’s shoulders. Really, it’s a circle jerk of hypotheticals, and I could ramble in Aozora Loops about the possibilities, but I think that there are some fairly simple chains of events leading from that one post of Jason’s in early 2006 to the aniblogosphere we frolic around in daily as 2008 comes to a close.

I’m not trying to say that I’m the central pillar of the EL aniblogging community (though I might if I were being less serious). I’m just pointing at the fact that Jason Miao set great things in motion, albeit unintentionally.

So I’d like to be the Raigyo to Jason’s white-haired children, and say this:

“Look at the seed you planted in me. Look how well I took care of it.”

I like the baby monsters given birth to by AoMM’s Echidna, and for that, I thank Jason Miao. Awwww yeah, I just went Greek mythology on your asses. What? You want the good ol’ Bible Bitchslap? Fine. Fuckin’ “monotheists.” Well, buckle up and brace for impact because I’m about to e-jaculate all over your keyboards:

Jason Miao is the Virgin Mary to my Jesus Christ, and for that, I thank him.

Hopefully, the above picture and the one right before it help illustrate the differences between Christianity and Greek mythology: Christianity got rid of the furries and taught people to be ego-centric. Who the fuck needs siblings? Not Jesus Christ.

Well, I’d say I’ve thanked Jason Miao enough. *retches*

Now I’d like to thank Kaioshin Sama for giving me the opportunity to give thanks where thanks were due. I can now return to hating Jason Miao to my Heart’s Content!

P.S. YES I AM THE MOTHER-FUCKING ANIBLOG MESSIAH.

P.P.S.

Bin Laden didn’t blow up the projects
It was U Jason
Tell the TRUTH Jason
Miao knocked down the towers
Tell the TRUTH Jason
Miao knocked down the towers

P.P.P.S. IN B4 “TOO SOON”