In this post I track the development of a meme. I may sound theoretical and profound, but the entire framework of this exercise is only based on an excerpt from this guide to some fruity way to live life at a higher level.

The excerpt:

6. Like all things, memes fit better with some things than others. Some memes naturally fit better in people’s minds. Some memes naturally fit better with other memes. When a group of memes fit well together and pull the strings of someone’s mouth and vocal cords so that they pass them on to others, a new, self-replicating thing gets created. The new thing is called a memeplex.

Self-replication is the most powerful force in the universe. One person tells two, two tell four, four tell eight, and pretty soon the whole universe is full of people sharing the memeplex.

Sometimes a self-replicating memeplex makes a mistake in copying itself. The memeplex with a mistake in it will either be better, worse, or the same at making copies of itself. If it’s better soon there will be more copies of the new memeplex than the old in the universe.

The only way for a new idea to gain acceptance is by a series of copying mistakes that turn out to be better after all.

And,

8. Every new idea we think of immediately becomes transformed by copying mistakes that change it into something that is better at making copies of itself after all. A key part of the idea may be sacrificed to something better for copying.

The only control we have over the spread of our ideas is in making them as resistant to copying mistakes as possible.

Okay, so let’s pretend that the quotes above are actually true. Now let’s look at this meme that I’ve been following, and have used in a few occasions:

“coming harder than omo”

It contains the ff. elements:

• An orgasm (the objective of most sexual activities)
• Omo (the blogger from the Omonomono blog)

The context for the meme developing finds its genesis in the comments section of this post on Owen’s Cruel Angel Theses blog, which accused omo of being a poseur for playing games and watching anime raw (unsubbed). Big drama in the comments section. Lelangir caught on and gave us this:

See the full comic here. Epic aniblogger metacomedy is epic. The statement actually reads “I already came.” However, the elements are the same: 1. Orgasm, 2. Omo. This gets copied, in sequence, several times:

1. 21stcenturydigital boy, no stranger to aniblogger metasex (lelangir documents his tryst with Omisyth here) posted some pornographic Toradora! fanfic which elicited a comment from lelangir himself:

lelangir Says:
December 15, 2008 at 8:21 PM

I came harder than omo.

2. These came out on the same day.

1st example:

1. Everyone came harder than omo.

   ghostlightning — 12/16/08 @ 5:43 am | #Link | Reply

2. Have you Come Harder Than Omo Yet?

   lelangir — 12/16/08 @ 6:13 am | #Link | Reply

3. @ghostlightning: best aniblog meme to date, gotta thank all the good folks involved for that.

   @lelangir: I’m going to have to find some way of putting that into KYOUSORA.COM as a tagline or something. It’s too genius.

   lolikitsune — 12/16/08 @ 7:14 am | #Link | Reply

2nd example:

ghostlightning Says:
December 16, 2008 at 9:10 PM

MOAR porn. I didn’t go where you went with Ryuji and Taiga, but you know I boned the shit out of Kinon.

Mix anime characters and add bloggers into it. That’ll mess things up quite nicely and everyone can come harder than omo.

Now it can be argued that the repeaters of the meme are forcing it. It doesn’t matter for the purposes of this post that the meme is forced. Looking back at the fruity guide to meme development: in copying the proto-meme, we were all doing it wrong. It is mistakes like this that stick. We now end up with a meme “coming harder than omo” that means what exactly? Not quite sure yet, but I’m very interested to find out.

Dr. lolikit sez:

If we apply lolikitean cryptology to “came harder than omo,” well, we come harder than omo. And because I’m a practicer of schadenfaggen, I don’t intend to share that with all of you. Gweheheh.

For now… go stand in the hallway.

P.S. Here’s to looking at a small blue bird, kid.

Madame lolikappa moans:

Furthermore, we are already beginning to see the way the meme is evolving. Originally it only applied to single people coming harder than omo, but is now increasing in number, spreading to meta-omogasmic aniblogger orgies. Clearly, the meme is well on its way to self-sufficiency, as it strives to find the form of maximum repetition. By switching to a multi-aniblogger mode, it broadens its potential contextuality; anibloggers can refer to entire teamblogs of anibloggers coming harder than omo simultaneously, in a single instance of the meme.

In conclusion, fuck you all, you’re all just goddamn membots, completely co-opted by the meta. You’re one epicly stupid meme away from being memeoids. Watch your asses.

Comrade ghostlightning Re-claims, In Conclusion:

Had to be done, after such an inconclusive attempt at a conclusion. That said, lolikappa’s use of a maho shoujo wand and a dance sequence turning all of you into memecha titillates me into hoping for another memetic neon genesis. See what we did here! In tracking the development of a forced meme we’re forcing an entirely new one! I think I just came harder than omo. This post is omosexual.

Does he not know? I’ve been waging this war on my own for years.

Here you can see DS’s original post, annotated by yours truly.

FUCK REVOLUTIONS, I WANT TO LIVE

DS says some big things, and he’s pretty vehement, but personally, I’m not entirely convinced. This is a new stance, and he has just about no experience dealing with bad anime (maybe he can see Haruhi’s shores from his back porch). I, as someone with a long history of battling anime, would prefer it if someone with more dedication were to take command.

I’m not going to say that I am most fit for this role—I know there are haters greater than I—but I would expect someone with at least half as many credentials to step up to the plate (as opposed to someone with none). Without further ado, I present unto you my credentials:

Exhibit A
Exhibit B

While Exhibit B is an example of my level-headed approach toward serious topics, it is still a commentary on how fucking bad some shitty anime can be. Read it at least three times—it’s deep.

Exhibit C
Exhibit D
Exhibit E
Exhibit F
Exhibit G
Exhibit H
Exhibit I

Sometimes, as exhibited by Exhibit I, I can be an concise anime hater.

Exhibit J
Exhibit K
Exhibit L
Exhibit M
Exhibit N
Exhibit O

In before “fuck anime, I want to live”—Exhibit O is srs fkn bsns, and if you take it lightly then you are just one more growth stemming from the cancer that is killing the aniblogosphere and giving a bad name to anime fans everywhere.

Exhibit P
Exhibit Q

Yes, Exhibit Q was, in fact, trolling on my part. Up yours, Owen.

Exhibit R

I stand by Exhibit R to this day.

Exhibit S
Exhibit T

Exhibit T is easily the coolest thing I’ve ever done.

Exhibit U
Exhibit V
Exhibit X
Exhibit Y
Exhibit Z

DS isn’t Kamina, but that’s no reason not to keep rowing. Bad anime is the power and your hatred is a hatred that will—argh, you get the picture.

Well, that was maybe two months ago now. It’s about time I get that blog post out there.

Majime na Lolikit

Anime Characters Are Too Sexual In The Eyes Of Anime Characters,
or Why Unwarranted Jealousy Isn’t Cool Anymore

Aoi and Kaoru

Ai Yori Aoshi is a sweet story about two childhood friends, Kaoru and Aoi, realizing more mature emotions toward each other… for about three episodes. Then, in quick succession, the show introduces three female characters and has them all over the main character. The ground nuts on top of the whipped cream would be that our two lovers must keep their relationship secret for some unbelievably hackneyed reason, and thus any further female characters will see any kindness from Kaoru as an advance.

There’s some illogic there, and I’ll get to it in a moment, but first, let me explain the plot of Ai Yori Aoshi:

Kaoru and Aoi get together.

Let me repeat that:

Kaoru and Aoi get together.

“But lolikit, didn’t they do that in episodes one through three?” you might ask. And the answer is yes. But the world doesn’t know this and so they must spend twenty-three more episodes getting together. This means twenty-three episodes of enduring “romantic comedy” involving Kaoru and his haremettes, who aren’t really his haremettes because he’s already involved with Aoi and he’s not unfaithful (he loves her, and wants to be with her).

It raises the question: why?!

“But lolikit, a show where nothing happens can be wonderful too!” you might protest. And I’m the first one to defend a lack of plot or direction. Someone was bitching at me yesterday about how Mushishi was too repetitive, and had no overarching plot. I don’t actually know anything about Mushishi other than its alleged awesomeness, but I defended it, saying that my favorite shows have nothing happen in them, so how could a bit of repetition or lack of plot be that bad? The problem is that in Ai Yori Aoshi, there isn’t “nothing happening.” Sure, it’s slice of life and laid back, but the show is pushing harem moments into our faces one after another.

And you know what?

Both “OMG LOVE TRIANGLE OMG,” and the classic question of “who will he pick,” are both invalidated by the knowledge that he’s going to be with Aoi. This isn’t Shuffle, where Rin can unexpectedly pick Asa. This is Suzuka, and Yamato is going to pick Suzuka.

First parallel with Nogizaka Haruka no Himitsu: we know the characters are going to be together, and we know this from the beginning.

Haruka and Yuuto are as “together” after two episodes of Nogizaka Haruka no Himitsu as Kenji and Nanami are at the beginning of Lamune.

Now, going back to Ai Yori Aoshi, I’d like to point out another trend. Despite having some vestige of confidence and self-esteem, our beloved female lead occasionally show signs of jealousy. Why? Does she not see that her dear Kaoru-sama is completely devoted to her? Well, she does—but her womanly intuition (you know, that thing anime characters love citing and using as an excuse for equating women to dumb animals incapable of analysis) tells her that the women surrounding her man are a threat to their relationship.

The Enemy

Q: Why are they a threat?
A: Because they’re making advances on Kaoru.

Q: Why are they making advances on Kaoru?

A: Because they think he’s totally hot for them.

Q: Why do they think he’s totally hot for them?
A: Because he’s nice to them (illogic, again, I’ll get to this later).

Second parallel with Nogizaka Haruka no Himitsu: the female lead worries unnecessarily about her relationship with the male lead when female characters with “no chance” (because the end couple is predetermined) enter the picture.

We see this with the Shiina in the second half of the show, many times.

Now I think is a fitting time to address the “illogic” I mentioned earlier. Take a look at this stereotypical line of events, common in trashy anime:

1. boy meets girl
2. boy, being a kind person, is nice to girl
3. girl thinks boy is being especially kind to her
4. girl falls for boy
5. boy wants nothing to do with girl
6. girl’s heart is broken

Suzumiya Akane

Well, you can see this formula in lots of places, I suppose. You can see it in Kimi ga Nozomu Eien, even—Suzumiya Haruka’s little sister Akane is attracted to Takayuki because he is “too kind to her.” The formula alone doesn’t make something trashy, and I guess a lot of that is in the execution. I’d say that in the majority of cases, though, the formula is a one-way ticket to lametasticity. And we see it in Ai Yori Aoshi. And we see it in Nogizaka Haruka no Himitsu.

We don’t see it too often in shoujo anime (more often, the guy is a jerk and the girl falls for him—hey, sounds like real life!) and we don’t see it too often in real life (examine: the last parenthetical comment).

The main problem with the formula, as I see it, is that it doesn’t make sense. We’re not talking spending thousands of dollars and years of time for the girl—we’re talking something simple. Lending an umbrella. Working together on schoolwork. Watching out for a fellow human being. Girls: you’ve interacted with humans before, I imagine. Tell me: head over heels for everyone who’s shown you courtesy? Wet panties for the random guy who shares his textbook with you?

I must confess to the misguided sin of not being born female, but even I with my limited knowledge of the opposite sex presume to know the answer to some fundamental questions such as the two above: no.

Sexuality doesn’t work that way.

And because sexuality doesn’t work that way, I consider my intelligence insulted every time an anime insinuates that a heterosexual man cannot have a girlfriend and girl friends without eliciting jealousy from his girlfriend. We saw this in Suzuka with Yamato getting shit from his miko girlfriend (AND from Suzuka) for being nice to Suzuka. (This is an ambiguously bad example because one could dispute that the miko girlfriend was right and that he was crushing on Suzuka, but that most certainly was not his intention and he was never unfaithful.)

Let me give a couple examples of rare anime where “my boyfriend/love interest is a heterosexual male, he must be interested in cheating on me with his large collection of female friends” illogic is not present:

1. Lamune
2. To Heart

this is hilarious, in a number of ways

Both of these shows have large female casts, no more or less attractive than any other lineup of female anime characters, and a male character who is very friendly and close with many of these characters. The female leads are no more egotistical than those of Ai Yori Aoshi or Nogizaka Haruka no Himitsu; they do not possess godly self-esteem. Yet they do not falter and they do not question, and that is well because their love interests, like most reasonable human beings, are not about to have relations with any girl they come across.

This characteristic holds for Kaoru and Yuuto, by the way. And yet…

Anyway, the sexuality of anime characters in the eyes of other characters is ludicrous in general. We see the attitude even in such blockbuster hits as Suzumiya Haruhi no Yuuutsu: in episode two, we are told by Kyon that Haruhi begins changing before the boys leave the room; she must view them as potatoes, and he says this with an air of distaste—this behavior is odd, unnatural, and for the sole reason that it reflects poorly on her sexuality.

Issues of hetero-/homosexuality aside, I feel like this statement in Suzumiya Haruhi no Yuuutsu is particularly ill-thought out.

The first problem with it is that the only good reason for changing in privacy is embarrassment. Embarrassment over how one looks. This should be independent of the potential viewer’s sexuality. If you don’t want someone staring at you while you’re changing, you don’t want someone staring at you while you’re changing. So really it’s more like Haruhi has no sense of shame (or that she has godly self-esteem, which I find unlikely given her behavior throughout the show and most especially her reaction to being thanked in episode 12).

The Ogre in question

The second problem with it is that “seeing men as potatoes” (and women, by the way—Kyon neglects to mention this, but I’ll point it out) is more likely part of Haruhi’s general disinterest in love. “Yeah, yeah,” you might say, “lolikit’s full of it. She’s thrilled when Kyon expresses interest in her.” But this is after being changed by what she experiences. At the show’s offset, she is “interested in a relationship with a time traveler, esper, etc.” but only because she’s interested in them period. Love isn’t her thing. And why?

Because she has a self-esteem issue. After being shown how pointless the individual is (remember her recollection of the ballgame) she has all but lost self-worth. She’s not a god or a bored human, “she’s a sixteen year old girl” (couldn’t help quoting Kannazuki no Miko here—I don’t know her age and I won’t be assed to look it up). She has her own existential quandary like so many angsty joshikousei, and it’s an obstacle in the way of caring one way or another about love and relationships. It’s not a matter of sexuality.

Man, I could go on harping about this one line of Haruhi for ages. But I could just as easily harp on any other example of characters taking each other’s sexuality too seriously. I’m sure there are at least one hundred per episode of Love Hina, and that’s only the face of an entire genre that is culpable of this behavior.

The main point here is: why so serious, Aoi? Why so serious, Haruka?

Your man is with you.

He’s not interested in the sluts throwing themselves at him, and neither are we.

So I ask you: why the unwarranted jealousy?

Miyamura Miyako, batshit

Oh, oh! Another awesome example: ef ~a tale of memories~ had this guy Hiro who loved this girl Miyako, but she went batshit because Hiro had a female childhood friend to whom he was friendly and supportive. Why the bitchiness, Miyako? Why the unwarranted jealousy? Your man is with you. (Another ambiguously bad example because Kei really did want Hiro inside her, but only ambiguously bad because Hiro clearly didn’t want in.)

I could present dozens more examples, but I think my point is made. This is my problem with Ai Yori Aoshi, and this is my problem with Nogizaka Haruka no Himitsu. This is my problem with a ton of romance shows. And that’s not to say that I have an inherent problem with romantic comedy. So long as it doesn’t make pretenses, and decides whether or not it’s harem/love polygon/etc., and sticks to that decision, I can forgive it its idiocy (for instance, I love Love Hina).

And finally, a good word in for Ai Yori Aoshi and Nogizaka Haruka no Himitsu: awwwwwwwwww the couples are so sweeeeeeeeet. (Thanks, Bawwwka-Raptor!)

Epilogue: If you didn’t know that Haruka and Yuuto were going to end up together, you haven’t seen a whole lot of anime. And in that case, I recommend the show to you. Take it as an opportunity to learn.

“My darkest secret is that my show was trash!”

Of course, rich people stealing from the less-well-off isn’t my biggest problem with the show. It’s less important to me than the fact that the show is Nogizaka Haruka no Himitsu-level trash. More on that later—seriously, I need to clear some things up with Mike regarding the merits of shows like these—but I just wanted to get this out of my way. Kicking people out of their rooms and vacations isn’t cool. So what if you’re a sheltered rich girl with expectations? So what if you thought you had a reservation? Taeko can own her mistake. Aoi is not more important than any other person, and this behavior is repulsive.

So much for the perfect girlfriend.

A bit of background: I started watching this show a looooong time ago, maybe a year or so now. It seemed really sweet for a couple episodes and then (my main problem with it) manifested and I put it on indefinite hold. Having sat through all of Nogizaka Haruka’s Shitfest, I decided that it would be an injustice not to finish Ai Yori Aoshi (more on the connection later). So here I am, watching my first episode in who knows how long. Sigh…

Anyway, I’m in the process of planning a pretty big post in my head regarding this show, Nogizaka Haruka no Himitsu, Suzumiya Haruhi no Yuutsu, and sexuality. It’ll be ready when it’s ready.

For as long as I’ve been watching Code Geass, the similarities between its protagonist and that of Death Note have been pretty evident. The plotting, the belief in their own mental superiority, the JUST AS PLANNED, the grand plans for ascension… and of course, the maniacal laughter. With Episode 25 of Code Geass R2, we finally have a difference to separate the two: Lelouch’s pool of blood is also a pool of victory. Light failed and Lelouch succeeded.

This final episode of Code Geass I feel validates the entire second season.

Sure, a lot of it didn’t make sense. There was lots of the usual Sunrise bullshit. But a lot of the wtf-ish moments we experienced in the last few episodes make sense now. We now know the details of Lelouch’s plan for world domination. We now know why he acted as he did. We now see the true purpose of Suzaku’s curse.

Sunrise finishes the series with what it knows best: impaling a main character with a sword.

And all the characters we care about get their happy endings (a better world!).

I have a few qualms, still, though I no longer doubt that Code Geass is simply a good show.

1. Lelouch is wrong. Suzaku can’t become an hero.

2. Cornelia and Nina are still alive and there was nothing about reforming their characters. They’re both evil, racist killers, and need to pay for their deeds of injustice.

3. Will Suzaku ~disappear into the Summer~ ? ’cause I still don’t like him too much.

4. Why does Nunnally become Empress? Makes no sense. Lelouch changed some laws in Britannia, and he ordered the royal family to recognize him, but now that he’s gone that should all change. Odysseus? The elder sisters? I don’t know, but Nunnally certainly is _not_ next in line.

5. Which brings me to the next problem. People are still under the effects of the geass, as far as we can tell. Lelouch didn’t order Jeremiah to un-geass everyone because Schneizel is now Suzaku’s bitch.

6. ZERO! ZERO! ZERO! The people like Zero too much. Lelouch’s plans may be shown to be working, but here’s what I think: in addition to erasing the people’s hatred, he increased their dependence upon Zero. All the more reason for Suzaku to disappear. You’re not going to recreate a healthy world where everyone is in love with what is, as Diethard so famously explained, a symbol.

7. Sayoko and Jeremiah :( :(

8. Lloyd and Kannon :( :(

9. Lloyd, period. What happened to him? He really lost his spirit in the last couple episodes. He’s like a husk of what he used to be. No more grandiose/psycho CONGRATULATIONS~~~~!! It are sadface worthy Y_Y

10. Lelouch’s methods are not permanent and he did not weed out evil.

This is really the biggest problem. Yes, he made the world better. But a peaceful, united world is just begging for a new dictator to arise. I guess Suzaku’s the stopgap until the world is settled into being better for everyone? (Education can’t be the first priority of rebuilding countries given that their citizens are starving and poor [war drains economies like nothing else], and until education can be invested heavily in there will always be evil-minded people.) In this case Suzaku will stain his hands more and bear even more burdens.

What?

It’s not like I feel sorry for him, or anything.

And now, one last problem… C.C.? Is this a resolution? Are you happy, or are you off to contract a new fuckbuddy and then have him kill you? Seriously, what’s your deal? You’ve lost everything you could possibly have decided to live for. Er, Lelouch. There was only one thing.

Well, these are al the ramblings of a tired mind. Now I’m off to finish Nogizaka Haruka so that I can write a more coherent post about it and why Mike is wrong about its supposed greatness.

P.S. if I had the geass, and wanted to make the world better, I’d become a rock star or actor or something. I’d go to a venue and geass everyone with the command, “live in a way that doesn’t hurt those around you.” Fuck yeah painless.