That core, that shit-of-the-shit: Ano Natsu de Matteru.

Some people go through life noting what gives them hope. Some people commemorate what restores their faith in humanity. Or in institutions, countries, television. In anime. Others do the opposite. We call them pessimists, or in layman’s terms, “the worst.” Before I’m accused of being a pessimist for saying that Ano Natsu refreshes all the loathing I carry for anime en general, I should note that I’m not usually bent on digging up the horrible things in life.

This is just that bad.

Mainly I just like to hate on the things idiots like. If it helps you to think of me as a troll, feel free. I’m mainly penning this in order to have an “eligible post in March” for the stupid Aniblog Tourney. It seems they learned their lesson last time and invited me this year. Popularity contests are the most important thing in the world, so I care a lot about winning.

So I’m here to plant my flag in the 2012 ABT, and I’m doing it with everyone’s favorite little poopwreck Ano Natsu. Don’t know what a poopwreck is? If you’re as mindless as Ano Natsu’s Onegai-Sensei-ripping-off “creative” staff, you’ll need an explanation…

poopwreck, n.: Like a trainwreck, but instead of a train (which goes fast and looks cool) going off a set of tracks, it entails a shit (which doesn’t move and smells like rotten ass) going off target. Whenever you witness it, you know you should commit suicide, because either it’s yours (in which case your ass is probably ineligible for LK cock) or it’s someone else’s (and you’re the creepiest fuck in the world).

So where does Ano Natsu go wrong, you might ask.

What is its crime?

I could say the obvious thing—that it’s downhill from the start, and that it’s unwatchable 2.5 minutes in—but I’m going to go farther. I’ve been largely silent lately (earning myself the title “lapsed”), and I feel I owe my readers, fans, and forlorn lovers a little something special. A real post. With real thoughts. Written in real words. As a bonus, I’ll leave sarcasm behind for the rest of this post. I think I overdid it last post. I got to the point where even I didn’t know whether I liked Thermae Romae or not. So just this once, as a reward both to you and to myself, I’m going to be straight with you.

Majime na Lolikit
• The moment I knew Ano Natsu was shit came in its second episode.
(For the record, I’ve watched eight of them, so none of this “judging a book by its cover” bullshit.)

Allow me to describe the scene: Kanna (the bitch), Kaitou (the pussy), Ichika (the slut), and Kaitou’s older sister are sitting around a table. The older sister is leaving for a while, and this means that Kaitou and Ichika are going to be living alone for a while. Kanna interrogates Kaitou, largely because she’s the bitch, inquiring into his plans with regard to participating in nightly Ichika buffets.

A master of motherly rhetoric, Kanna says something like this of Kaitou:

“Just because he’s living with a pretty senpai, it’s not like he’ll get up to any funny business or funny business, or funny business, right?” (sic. some fansubbers or something)

She and the older sister glare at Kaitou, repeat that “right” a few times. Ichika is grinning awkwardly, and Kaitou’s spinning into a defensive flurry befitting the pussy. He denies all implied accusations and promises not to violate his foxy guest. Kanna and his older sister say they’re relieved, but are clearly still suspicious.

Let’s examine this moment.

Where is Ichika’s agency?

No, let me know when you find it, I’m interested.

… what was that?

You don’t know where Ichika’s agency went?

Well holy fucking shit you’re right! It’s gone! And who took it away from her? Was it a bad rapist? Was it an evil misogynist? No: it was her “supporters,” the other two women at the table. Along with Ichika’s agency, they’re also robbing Kaitou of his individuality (prejudicially assuming that he’s a violator) and me of my will to watch the show. By putting the abstinence onus on the guy, and not saying a word to the girl, they are totally disempowering her and validating any idea the guy might have that the girl is just sex object—one not to touch, yes, but one nonetheless. One that couldn’t, you know, say “no.”

And one that couldn’t say “yes.”

Listen, I’m all for telling guys that it’s not good to rape people. And maybe Kaitou needs to hear this, though he really doesn’t seem like a rapist to me. But the moment the dialogue around sex excludes either interested party, it becomes a reactionary bullshit fest. The choice is put in Kaitou’s hands. He can choose to have sex with Ichika, though Kanna is counting on him not doing that. He can choose to not have sex with Ichika, and that will make him a good person. She has no choice in the matter. It’s being made for her by Kanna and Kaitou’s sister, and that’s not how sexual choices should be made. It’s her body. It’s her life.

Ano Natsu is by no means original, and that applies in this department as well. We see this kind of conservative crap in tons of anime. There are countless cultural norms and mores that entail guys being warned not to force themselves on girls. These norms turn the girl into a listless slab of meat. “Good luck, Ichika. I really hope Kaitou won’t rape you, ’cause we all know you’ve got no say in the matter.”

But Dr. lolikit, you might object, it’s just anime.

Anime is culture. Culture is education. We learn lessons from every thought we consume. I hope you learn the lesson I did from Ano Natsu (that it’s shit), but there are other lessons one could learn from it. I have friends who like this show, friends who have fallen victim to it. It’s not just that moron Hanners. And even Hanners could do to understand the piss he’s drinking. I’m a benevolent guy.

Is it too much to ask for a show to signal some forward thinking, some progressive attitudes toward sexuality? Is it too much to ask for a show to not rob its female characters of agency over their own bodies?

If your answer is yes, you’re a failed human being.

And to all failed human beings, I say this: anime will always be an abhorrently flawed genre so long as Ano Natsu-level bullshit runs rampant within its boundaries.

Lolikit. LK-niisan. Where did you fall so hard? What happened to the trolling? What happened to the violence, the hate, the rage? How is it, that these many years on, I am the sole surviving LK that legitimately dislikes Lucky Star, K-ON, all of it? You had to have known. You had to have suspected. Your irony will only carry you so far, LK-niisan.

I still rage. I still protest. I still leave in rage when my anime club at school puts on Lucky Star. (No, seriously, guys. They made me sit through the first episode. It was SO BAD. What the fuck do you see in this show!? Other than Shiraishi Minoru. Minoru-sama is still god.) I still make obscene jokes about YFR and CJ. I still bitch about Jason fucking Miao. I still fuck up my tags. Nothing will change, in my soul. Call me a dinosaur if you will! A relicant! A fossil of a by-gone era of trolling! But I will hold out. I will make my random unpredictable violent posts that no one gives a shit about. I will keep following the twitters of a dozen anibloggers whose blogs I don’t read. I will keep hating on what I signed on to hate, back in 2005.

I’m not giving up. Never will my hate fade. K-ON is nothing but fucking moeblobs doing what moeblobs do worst: aspire to quality.

So fuck. That. Shit.

.lolikappa

A new decade is upon us! There are many strange things afoot in the world of the aniblogosphere! A great otaku cleansing is underway! A baby has been born! Certain females have embraced their true calling as agents of the truth of YFR! These are all clearly omens and signs that it is high time to shake things up in the world.

As such, I have stepped up to the plate to rule as notdotq’s new overlord.

Greetings underlings, I am lolikappa, your new lord and master.

Or something.

For those of you who don’t recognize me, I’ve been here longer than all of you, so shut the fuck up and sit down. I’m a duck and shit, I watch animu, I play vidjamagames, I go to school in the frigid east, and I’ve been IRL archrivals with lolikit for like six years or some shit. Traditionally I make one post on here a year, despite having originally been a coblogger or something like that.

So what happened to lolikit? Well, see, last week he made a grave error. He took on the guise of someone he shouldn’t have. He overstepped his bounds. He took on the mantle of the most rapturous raptor, the madman in the sexy hat, the one, the only… Baka-Raptor-Jesus. He reigned on high for a few glorious hours, but was soon struck down by the mighty hand of the real Baka Raptor, and is thus lost to the world. The mighty lizard cast his pale imitator out into the wild world, where his scrabbling family caught hold of his flailing limbs, and dragged him off into the horizon.

(Of course, I was the one who got him to take on that guise in the first place. As Kurosawa would say… just as keikaku.)

So what will notdotq be like under my reign? Not much different. I’m going to try to post every day, even though most of those posts will be meaningless drivel. Maybe there’ll be a Winter Kickoff Shit? Or maybe some ramble about Eden of the East, or Brotherhood, or Bakuman, or Casshern, whatever else I’m watching/reading these days. WHO THE FUCK KNOWS.

And maybe this regime change won’t be permanent. Maybe someday lolikit will return. But maybe, just maybe…

Maybe this is the dawn of a glorious new decade.

.lolikappa

KEKEKEKEEKEKEKEKE

OKAY I DONT KNOW WHAT TO SAY HERE SO I’M NOT GOING TO PUT ANYTHING OF SIGNIFICANCE ON HERE, UMM.

OBVIOUSLY THIS ISN’T LOLIKITSUNE BECAUSE HE DOESN’T BELIEVE IN CRUISE CONTROL FOR COOL, BUT I DO!!!!!!@#!@

(HELL YEAH HE SAYS FROM BESIDE ME AS WE STARE AT THIS MONITOR AT LIEK 3 AM. BECAUSE WERE AWESOME. AND BCUZ I CAN SPELLS.)

(AND BCUZ I AFRAID MAI ROOM.)

OKAY I’M DONE HERE I THINK. ANYWAY. ENJOY THE SKETCHES AND LOLIKIT HAS AN AWESOME TABLET THING. UMMM YEAH. OKAY. OUT.

SAKI

As some of you realized, I made a bold move two posts ago. I drew up and posted my conception of lolikitsune, a maybe-trap-maybe-not loli with fox tail, giving an inelegant finger to anyone and everyone.

DiGiKerot was the first person to do the necessary: he drew fanart.

Following in his footsteps were anonymous and o.s.k., both of whom decided that Rule 34 is a necessary evil item. Both images are NSFW: lolikit rule 34 by anonymous, nanoha x lolikit by o.s.k.. Don’t get me wrong—being crossed with my favorite anime girl ever is not the worst thing that could happen to me. It’s just… Rule 34. lolikit. If you know me in real life, you’re gouging out your eyeballs.

EDIT: apparently, if you know me in real life, you’re drawing your own fanart.

EDIT 2: apparently, if you know me in real life, and if you’re totally fucked up, you’re… … I don’t know what you’re smoking, but whatever it is, it’s strong.

o.s.k. just did to me as Zero did to Orange-kun by writing a fanfic for Kyousora.com that involves Mizunashi Akari of Aria. Rule 14 has decimated my country, salted my fields, and yelled 187 on my mother-fucking corpse. For those unfamiliar with the navigation of Kyousora.com, basically what you want to do is this: click on the “YFR” link on the right side of the main page. Then look at the number in the upper or lower right-hand corners of the main box—it should say “X of 11. Refresh to view MOAR.” And yes, you guessed right—if you don’t land on #11 the first time, just keep refreshing until you reach it.

above pic slightly obsolete, shows “of 9″ instead of “of 11″ but otherwise accurate

o.s.k. is “orangesqueeze-kun.” o.s.k. may or may not be eligible to join the all-girls’ aniblogging round robin. o.s.k. seems to have made it his/her life-long mission to rape all the things I hold dear and precious. o.s.k. does not have a URI. o.s.k. may or may not be one of my whores. o.s.k. is not anonymous.

above pic slightly obsolete, shows “of 9″ instead of “of 10″ but otherwise accurate

a fairy tale of heat and passion