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your thoughts have summoned this post from hell so, as i pray... Home > Archives > 2009 > February > 24 Potential Project: Meditations on First LoliconI don’t have the artistic talent to make this a manga. I don’t have the time to write it out as a story, either. But it’s (I think) an awesome idea, and I may take it up in the future, either making some sort of written or visual work out of it. Or maybe a game. I can see it working as a visual novel. Anyway… without further ado, let me present to you: Meditations on First Lolicon. Cast of Characters でか ルト—a man approaching the limit of being able to call himself “young,” Ruto is an otaku and a NEET. He spends all his time alone in his room, safe within his room; he touches no one and no one touches him. Simon and Garfunkel song lyrics aside, he is a total recluse as far as meatspace is concerned. He has no friends, has no contact with his family, and eats only what food can be ordered online and delivered to his doorstep. Ruto is a lurker in cyberspace, and makes his name only through the number of days in his myanimelist.net account—over nine thousand. God—a PHLAG, minus the “anime” because she’s (allegedly) real. She resides in Ruto’s closet, though he doesn’t know this because he never turns away from his computer. Her origins are mysterious, the extent of her powers unknown, her motives secret. The Christian Anime Club—a group of anime watchers who contest Ruto’s discoveries after he publishes them. The Atheist Anime Club—a group of anime watchers who contest Ruto’s discoveries after he publishes them. Part 1 Ruto, after witnessing countless arguments between self-branded philosophers on myanimelist.net, decides to seclude himself from the last vestiges of civilization with which he associates himself (MAL and anime), and pursue the truth of the world. Along the way, he becomes good friends with his long-time companions the fridge and the alarm clock, who act as his loyal yes-men. In the end, he discovers the truth—God exists! Part 2 After Ruto makes his discovery, we get more insight into God, the little girl living in Ruto’s closet. We learn about her backstory; why she’s hiding here, why she ran away from home, what kind of a person she is[1], and so on. This is done with extensive use of flashbacks and too much exposition. Part 3 In what amounts to one long Phoenix Wright parody, objections regarding Ruto’s discoveries (which he published on his otherwise unpopulated MAL blog) are raised and responded to. In the end, Ruto runs out of cup ramen and withers away at his computer. There will be a tearful epilogue in which his computer, a thinking, feeling thing, unfolds its haunches, gets up from its perch, buries the philosopher otaku’s body in a mausoleum constructed of DVD boxes, and then, AAAAAND that’s all I’ve got so far, folks. Tell me what you think. Also, if anyone wants to take this up, feel free to, though I will be critical of the style with which you do it (note: style here is synonymous with “classiness”). Rock! EDIT: acknowledging that the intellectual masturbation may be lost on some, here’s some context. Footnotesthese notes are like lelouch's head to the boot of this post's suzaku
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it is moist & delicious meta and it's not even a lie! 24 ResponsesLeave a Comment |
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Nazarielle said:
Would read. Over and over again. Daily.
lolikitsune said:
@Nazarielle: hahaha, thanks for the vote ;)
lelangir said:
wtf?
lolikitsune said:
@lelangir: that’s what Ruto’s asking.
Kabitzin said:
Isn’t this just a gender-swap of Serial Experiments Lain?
lolikitsune said:
@Kabitzin: did Lain have OBJECTION!? I don’t think so.
Owen S said:
Shittiest shit that was ever shat out of a butt. Too much ripping off NHK, not enough originality, a gag series without enough gags. Needs less e/n.
Also needs, y’know, Actual Content™?! I guess you’d end up with something that’s a parody of… Excel Saga, which means that you’re making a parody of a parody, which is hilariously parodic in its own right. In the wrong way.
Yes, yes, we know, BOO HOO YOU CAN KILL GOD WOW GOD DIES WHEN S/HE IS KILLED. It’s still an incredibly hackneyed, flat, and uninspiring way to go about it, and while mashing together random tropes to make characters worked out for ZUN whenever he makes a new Touhou series, you’re not ZUN, and this is not a shmup. Neither are you Akamatsu, for that matter (!!).
Definitely needs less e/n.
lolikitsune said:
@Owen S: so NHK has a monopoly on the use of NEETs or something? The character is nothing alike and neither are his circumstances. I also don’t subscribe to pigeonholing (“gag series”? you’re kidding).
Also, your comment rips off Megatokyo too much; not enough original content.
EDIT: in response to your edit, Excel Saga? I wasn’t thinking of Excel at all. I think you’re projecting!
EDIT 2: in response to your second edit, the point isn’t killing God. Killing God would be one or two panels in the last few pages, an afterthought as it were, and as should be obvious she’s not actually God (she just tells Ruto she is). In other words, I’m not “going about” killing God at all. As for mashing together tropes, I barely have a cast (two characters). Whatever God is, it matters less than Ruto’s perception of what she is. Ruto himself is not a mashing together of tropes. He’s got the NEET thing going, but that doesn’t count unless you admit that it can be a trope and thus that it’s not limited to NHK.
Owen S said:
I like how defensive lk gets when no one likes his idea. LET ME PARODY YOUR COMMENT, THIS DECREASES THE VALIDITY OF WHAT IT’S SAYING. MY POKEMONS, LET ME SHOW YOU THEM. Also, brb making fun of Lelangir and Kabitzin on Twitter because they don’t understand my genius!!!!
Speaking of yes-men, I think you should have asked Jason Miao to post this for you on his blog, because he has tons of those. Sorry for giving actual criticism!
I guess your idea counts as a pastiche of some sort, albeit one that doesn’t really do what a well-done pastiche does. Go back to the drawing board.
lolikitsune said:
@Owen S: because you’re totally not parodying the things I say :P
Also, Miao doesn’t talk to me :(
In any event, it seems your decision to be less of an abrasive asshole on Christmas has been defenestrated (troll me harder, please!), and this is saddening. Come back when you’re ready to calm down for real, and protip for next time: try to be more sincere.
Two more things. Stick to the facts (“no one likes [my] idea” is not a fact). Defensive? People are defensive when they’re attacked. How’s that for a Shirouesque truism?
Cheers!
EDIT: it occurs to me that you have created an argument in a public place. I guess all your bitching before regarding public bickering was either A) a bunch of lies, or B) not worth holding onto. In either case, you gave me a lot of shit over things you don’t actually hold as truths for yourself. Congrats.
Owen S said:
I can see you running off to Twitter to QQ more should more people dislike your idea. True_Tears much?
I dunno, I guess if you’ve been brooding about this idea all along and someone genuinely believes that it sucks and tells you why, you’re bound to take it personally and look at it like some kind of personal attack, but eh. Nice red herring!
I genuinely find it terrible. I genuinely find it uninspiring. I am not about to be your little yes-man and tell you what I find good about it, because it’s a parody of a parody, not a parody per se, hence my inability to see whatever good there might be in it. And I’m not mincing my words, I’m just being me.
Hi, my name is Owen S. Nice to meet you! I live in this corner of the internet, and don’t sugarcoat my opinions. Tact? What’s that? Is it edible?
Anyway, no need to go sulk in the corner because no one (for now) likes your little baby. I’m sure someone else will comment in this thread telling you what an awesome idea it is (without telling you why they think it’s an awesome idea), how they will have your babies, and how many times they will come to it when it comes out.
For now, however, try and accept that I do not like it, and we’ll get somewhere! There was something written somewhere about acceptance being the first step? Not animeblogging for ages, then making a post expecting praise for a vaguely-related-to-anime-brain-fart (or, to use a more sinister phrase, “plot bunny”) is like… doing what mike does, only you’re not writing about literature. I’m sure you see where I’m coming from. If you don’t, then you know what to do!
Baka-Raptor said:
So basically, your characters are Takumi and Seira-tan.
lolikitsune said:
@Owen S: A personal attack? I learned long ago that you’re just an angry person, Owen. I don’t regard anything you do as “personal.” Nice try though.
I accept that you think it’s bad. It’s not hard to accept that. I just find the reasoning in your comments (or rather, the lack thereof, and the random finger-pointing) to be incredibly unintelligent. Try accepting that?
To clear up a few of your convenient misconceptions:
- I didn’t brood about the idea; it occurred to me within the last few hours.
- You didn’t tell me why you think it sucks, unless you’re a complete idiot and actually think it sucks for the incorrect reasons you listed in your original comment.
- It’s not a parody of a parody.
- I’m not sulking, at least, not because you decided to spill your milk here. I’ve got a bigass paper due shortly that I am procrastinating, and that is hanging over me. Sour mood? Not your fault, surprisingly.
- Regarding your not liking it, is that supposed to matter to me? I thought you wanted me to not care at all about anything you said or something (you gave me shit for respecting you too much once).
@Baka-Raptor: Seira-tan is a delusion of Takumi’s, yeah? So no, God is not Seira-tan. Also, Takumi is an idiot, a hater, and a scaredy cat. Ruto is none of those.
Owen S said:
I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that you probably shouldn’t attempt to audition for American Idol ever, since you’re probably going to be one of those people who takes Simon Cowell’s advice personally, start spewing invective at the judges, and have to be dragged off-stage by security.
Either that or you’ll just burst into tears in front of the camera after you walk out that door. And I thought this thing only happened on TV. Whoops, my bad, I don’t have the credentials as a written work/visual art critic, so everything here is one giant ad hominem, really.
In other news, everything I said here is according to how I viewed your work, and if you think that I’m “incorrect”, then hey! I love this country. Yours, I mean. Not mine. Nice poisoning the well, but to say I’m “angry”, ergo I am rubbishing your idea is like attributing 9/11 to your having diarrhoea that morning–giving yourself too much credit.
That this idea occurred to you within the last few hours makes this overreaction of yours all the more priceless. If this is a troll post, why so serious? If this isn’t a troll post, you need to reassess your reactions when it comes to criticism.
Sorry for listening to that part of your post. I guess the next time you use the line in bold on this blog I will proceed to ask you if you’ve watched Anime A, B, and C, before asking you about the weather and your health and other enquiries of well-being in general. Or just ask you to read this book that I’ve read recently, it’s really really good, and it’s literature, you must read it too!
lolikitsune said:
@Owen S:
Whatever that is. Whoever that is.
Wow, you really took what you were saying in that first comment seriously? Guess it’s the idiot route then, and I am very sorry to hear about the loss of your thinking faculties—which is to say, once again, that your crap about NHK, about Excel Saga, about mashing together tropes, about killing God, and about parodying parodies is all an incorrect assessment of the stuff at hand.
I can’t tell if your imagination is overactive or inactive, but somehow you acquired some grossly wrong conceptions. And when I tried to correct them by explaining how they were wrong, you got on me for being defensive? Bien joué.
This isn’t a troll post, it’s a spontaneous post. Two notes about criticism: I was more than happy to clear your misconceptions, and constructive criticism usually doesn’t involve insults (“shittiest shit” etc.). Maybe you need to reassess your methods when it comes to criticism?
Nice attack on mike there btw, I lulzed. Anyway, you can only tell me what you think if you think and you haven’t demonstrated much of that lolololol
But seriously, dude, go review Phaëton and learn something useful about life in general that also applies to human interaction.
Anon said:
This is such an awesome idea.
Can I have your babies, LK?
I will come to it 12 effing times when it comes out.
lolikitsune said:
@Anon: fuck you Owen.
Alar said:
Needs more loli sex.
ghostlightning said:
I TOO ANI-ILLITERATE TO GET THE REFERENCES.
This is the basis of my criticism: it’ll only have value to very literate (in otaku literature) otakus. The religious debate within has a lot of appeal to me, but me getting lost in a sea of references may not be good.
Then again Cowboy Bebop had stacks of pancakes of references that I’m still just getting now and it still impressed me.
How many individual works are being referenced and how important are these to generating the value in the text? This question may be useful to you.
lolikitsune said:
@Alar: there’ll be none of that.
@ghostlightning: the only direct reference that I had in mind was Descartes’ meditations, which this is a parody of.
Sixten said:
Miao Diary is almost finished. Want to have a contest? You start this project, and I’ll start a new project. Whoever has the more lolitastic project (complete or not) at the end of August 2009 wins.
lolikitsune said:
@Sixten: I don’t like contests :( But also, I simply don’t have time to do anything with this right now. I’ve got a ridiculous amount of shit on my plate to take care of, from school work to other writing projects to my visual novel.
Also, you would win for sure. :P
Aizen said:
Initially sounds good but Part 3 is just a total wtf out of the box.
And a loli God? Where do I start worshipping?
VG said:
lololololol at Owen losing his composure again.
I think this idea has potential, but it just needs a little polish here and there. It would appeal to a very niche audience, but that’s better than appealing to no one in particular.
I have a lot of ideas like this that I know I’m never going to be able to see to fruition, and that’s just sad. :(