“But never mind any of that,” says Sekai earnestly, “let’s practice!”

Watching School Days was possibly the most pleasing anime experience of my life. It was a Saturday night, Memorial Day weekend; I was with a friend in a dark viewing room at Fanime. I, being a proficient aniblogger, knew the spoilers. He didn’t. The rest of the room didn’t.

I’d been prepping my friend all day, throwing “Nice [Noun]” references all over the place. Quoting the final scenes of School Days such that he wouldn’t be able to guess what I was hinting at, all the while piquing his curiosity.

I was sleep-deprived, I was cold, I was hungry.

And I marathoned that mother-fucker with my friend and the rest of the viewing room. It was one hell of a painful show, but every additional moment of Makoto dipfaggery brought me one step closer to hilaritygasm. I knew what was in store for him. No one else in the room did. People were getting up and leaving in disgust. By the time shit really started hitting the fan, the room was half-empty.

My friend was on the edge of his seat.

I had figuratively creamed myself at least ten times.

“This isn’t practice anymore.” – Sekai

“I feel like if I stay with you, the same thing will happen to me as happened to Sekai.” – Hikari

“I was reckless and impatient back then! I’m different now.” – Makoto

What’s not to love about a show in which your typical weak male lead actually makes decisions, and those decisions involve bedding every single girl in his school? Oh, and let’s not forget to mention impregnating them. Heh, the Bible Belt would love Makoto, and so did I! The answer to my question is “not a whole lot, if you’re sleep-deprived and meme-prone.”

Makoto’s head got its ride on a pleasant ship, and those remaining in the viewing room stood up and gave that mofo a standing ovation.

School Days got a 10/10 from me, just for that one night stand.