we're finally notdotq anymore

This one’s a bit of a shocker, so make sure you’re not standing/eating/drinking/wearing pants as you click that “continue” link…

Drumroll, please?

There are some people who like this show.

One of my good internet friends, the webmistress over at Again Tomorrow?. One of those noob anime bloggers, Shadro. Numerous other people as well. This is like Highschool of the Fucking Dead, except instead of zombies, you have people who like shitty anime, and instead of a harem of hot girls, all I have are my trolling powers!

Now, because I need to start the good fight somewhere, and because Again Tomorrow? is my friend, I’m going to have to start a war with that noob anime blogger. First, let’s check the basics: he doesn’t list me on his blogroll? Excellent. He’s not two weeks into blogging (I don’t want to pull another YY maneuver)? Excellent.

And now to mercilessly beat the poor guy to a pulp.

Lolikit Presents…
           A thorough dissection of Shadro’s Kyousora 6 Review!!

“Yeah, I kinda forgot about this series for a bit there. Why though, I have no clue.”

Gee I wonder why. Maybe because it’s forgettable? Naw, that can’t be it. I for one won’t forget how bad it is so easily. Then why indeed…

“It is a good series and this episode has reminded me of that.”

This is episode 6 he’s talking about. The one I didn’t even bother blogging about because it was so shitty? Remember, fucking horse excrement? It’s like, the episode in which they try to pull that Evangelion/Mai-HiME/Kiddy Grade/Lain “what if this was the way things were?” shit, only to rub it in your face that they in fact are incapable of executing powerful show mechanisms like that. It’s like, the episode where Kuu dreams that everything is fake, and then sees herself getting impaled by Kyoushiro (lol, Kyousora.com content coming up on that right thurr!!) only to actually not be dead, or even harmed in the slightest. Also, Kozue doesn’t make her grand comeback, existing only in Kuu’s mind. Maybe Kuu should become the database for Pandora…? Zawmphgue, Interlude/Zegapain references.

“So not only was there a lot of action, but the first half was basically a drug trip…”

I’m with him up through here…

” and it was awesome. “

… but how did he arrive at THAT conclusion, out of all the possibilities? Listen up, kids. There’s ONE anime in which “basically drug trip” worked, and that was Spring and Chaos. No, Paranoia Agent DID NOT WORK. No, the first half of this episode was not awesome. It was like “let’s beat the audience over the head with the fact that we suck. Again. And again. And again. But let’s work some of the most minimalistic pseudo-intelligence into this so that all those poor fuckers out there who like shows like Suzumiya Haruhi no Yuuutsu and Paranoia Agent think that this episode is totally kickass!!” It’s not even pandering to the otaku fap-dom. It’s insulting the intelligence of EVERYONE WHO CONSUMES ANIME.

“For not only did it make no real sense”

Warning! Warning! When things don’t make “real sense” it’s not that you can’t comprehend them! It’s that they’re incomprehensible!

“but it questioned everything that happened to that point…only to confirm it was true”

Woot accomplishing nothing. You know what I’ll change my mind. This was the best half-episode of all of Kyousora, because NOTHING HAPPENED, and when NOTHING HAPPENS, that means NOTHING SHITTY IS HAPPENING, right?

“Then after that, there were some crazy fight parts for the other half of the episode.”

Vader: “Luke! The fight parts were crazy with you.”
Luke Skywalker: “Eh? Who told you that?”
Vader: “I dunno. Some anime blogging bloke.”
Luke Skywalker: “Well how crazy were they?”
Vader: “Mmm… about as crazy as a small tsundere loli.”

Not very convincing is it? Yeah? Bonus points to anyone who catches the reference. And no, it’s not Star Wars, you bloody morons.

“3 shinny things fighting each other really does keep you interested.”

Hey, I never knew. I guess that if you’re the kind of person who goes “oooo shiny” (except in the touched sense, not the comedic sense) then yes, THREE shiny things will REALLY make you go “oooo!!” … Mechs have always been selling points for some anime, but Kyousora of all shows really doesn’t do a grand job of making use of its mech. Evangelion showed us the way much like how Sagara taught his rugby team to “Kill! Kill! Kill!”—it demonstrated optimal use of a strategy. Mech can be used to alleviate physical woes from the human cast, giving them time to sulk around and contemplate the meaning of life (hence awesome emo existentialist anime like Zegapain). In Kyousora? All the main character contemplates is how to get her clothes dirty next. Those shiny things fighting? As Nayuki would say, “ima ga nai yo, Yuuichi~”

“Though there was a lot of other stuff going on other than that too.”

Oh? How did you notice? I thought the hot mechxmech action had you completely absorbed?

“It starts to show what happens when mana is given and so on. I really have no clue what that could lead to. Really, the series will keep me guessing, I don’t think there is a way to guess what will happen”

Bitch please. I was making guesses from episode one. Also stop fucking contradicting yourself. If you’re going to say you like shitty anime, at least take a solid stance on it so that intelligent people like myself can attack you coherently! Either it keeps you guessing or it keeps you from guessing, make up your damn mind.

“Overall, it was a good episode and I should have watched it sooner.”

Yeah. You should have watched it sooner, in hopes that your suffering be done.

It is well worth the watch and it looks that it will continue at this standard.

Believe it or not, from episode 6, it manages to get worse! Look forward to it! Speaking of looking forward to shit, is there or isn’t there going to be Haruhi S2? I really hope there isn’t, but if there is, I can sit back and laugh at all you losers watching (and enjoying!!) it!

One thing though, it seemed near the end the animation quality just dropped, it was really weird.

Believe it or not, from episode 6, it manages to get worse! Look forward to it!

Also it should be noted that this guy uses fewer screenshots than I do. His post has 3… my average Kyousora post has 20. I’m the king of minimalist blogging and lack of images; I’m the one to whom you say “tl;dr” as you glance over my 5000-word expositions on the existence or lack thereof of Killer Lolis in Higurashi no Naku Koro ni. And this noob trumped me? Fuuuuuuuuuck. A noob trumps a normal guy, it’s embarrassing. A noob trumps a lolicon, that’s the end of his life!