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your thoughts have summoned this post from hell so, as i pray... Home > Archives > 2007 > February > 21 Chess with a prime Asian LoliI am a lolicon. That is, I am a con-man who enjoys lollipops. Yestereve, for whatever reason, I ended up playing chess with this little Asian girl. She couldn’t have been more than six or seven; she was absolutely tiny and her speech wasn’t that of someone who’s been in school an awful long time. I would be more specific on things like setting and occasion, but I risk giving away who I am—or worse yet, who my onii-sama is—by doing so. Thusly, for now, just imagine the LK you know and hate/love/disregard, playing chess at some undisclosed location with this tiny little Asian girl. No, I didn’t do anything bad to her. However, I did absolutely crush her. I took almost every single piece of hers. It was orgasmic. Not as orgasmic as Skyping with Pip, mind you, but orgasmic is orgasmic. I considered writing more self-fic for Kyousora.com, but then I realized that this was a real little girl and that would just be wrong. Never mind that bishops are awfully phallic, and that chess boards can double as very effective gags. No, I’ve never thought this through. No, I’ve never pondered raping anyone. Er… I raped her. On the board. That is to say I swooped in and annihilated her position, finishing her with a solid check mate on the first rank. And… you know what? I feel kind of bad about it. I mean, I played my hardest, and she played her hardest, and while my win was decisive, it wasn’t assured from the get-go. I’m a terrible chess player. But even though I wasn’t good enough to “hold back,” I feel bad for not doing so. I feel really bad for beating her. I really do. Any advice, aside from “play her again, and this time SIIHP” ? P.S. – this is my way of saying, “I’ve been playing stepmania nonstop for three days, haven’t been spending time in the anime blogosphere, won’t have an anime-related entry for another couple days/weeks/months/years/eons, and am thusly presenting you with Authentic Life of the Lolikit filler crap.” |
it is moist & delicious meta and it's not even a lie! 15 ResponsesLeave a Comment |
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Aluur said:
FIND OUT IF SHE’S A LILY!
Afterwards, see if you can invite more than one little azn gurl and try to leave them alone together at one side of the room.
Fireworks and shoujo bubbles ensue. Plus flutes.
lolikitsune said:
Dude, there’s like a 0% chance she even knows what sexuality is.
TripleA said:
You raeped a little Asian girl… can we see the pictures? :P I promise my intentions are of chess playing only.
kuroi said:
StepMania is far too addicting for its own good and should be destroyed.
You could probably beat me at chess as well. Hell, the little girl could probably beat me at chess.
lolikitsune said:
>>You raeped a little Asian girl… can we see the pictures? :P I promise my intentions are of chess playing only.
There were no pictures taken.
It was… you know, a chess game. >_>
tj han said:
Asian ettiquette involves letting the other person win, or at least gain some sort of foothold if she’s a tiny loli. SHAME ON YOU. At least you played chest with her.
Os said:
You dirty bastard. Why didn’t you mention that she wasn’t wearing any clothing?
lolikitsune said:
I didn’t want to arouse suspicions, of course.
TripleA said:
Let it be a rule that if anyone ever plays chess with a naked loli, they will take pictures of it. For chess purposes.
lolikitsune said:
I like the way that rolls out.
Impz said:
At least you played chest with her.
Impz said:
bah, it got cut off but actually, what i meant to say is that the quote above from tj. You are playing chest with the loli, not chess.
tsk tsk tsk.
Guncannon said:
Watch out for the 4chan partyvan, lol.
Michael said:
FOR CHESS PURPOSES.
cRABATTLLE said:
Chess with a prime Asian Loli…
I am a lolicon. That is, I am a con-man who enjoys lollipops…
I raped her. On the board. That is to say…
stop.. ÅEÖASFPLLAKLFKUCKYOU please? D;