SOMETHING FOR THE GIRLS WHO WATCH THIS SHOW.

Wait, what girls who watch this show? Are we trying to pander to guys now? Gay guys? Or does the show assume (and rightly so) that those who watch this show fall into the “sexually deviant otaku fanboy” category? God damn. We’re predictable.

HET-SAN IN BATH.

She shall be Het-san from now on for she is heterochromatic! Purple+gold is definitely a hotter combination than like… fuck, green+blue? Green+red? Take your loli dolls elsewhere, we got hot doms here. Hot doms into YFR. Yessssssss.

A SPARSE KITCHEN.

No sink, no cupboards, just a maid and a boiling pot? Well, I guess that’s plenty furnishings for hot sex, but it doesn’t make a whole lot of sense given the feast that results from Setsuna’s cooking. Cooking of what, though? And where?

“GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY KITCHEN, BITCH!”

… is what Setsuna wanted to say. I really, really want her to go psycho and kill Kuu. That would make the show, like, actually good! We’d all be able to enjoy it, not just sexually deviant otaku fanboys like myself.

GIRLS MAKE HIM SUPPER WHILE HE PLAYS VIOLIN?!

What a spoilt bitch. If I knew him in person, I’d slap him. Twice. On each butt cheek. Before raping him. Seriously. He’s hot stuff. I really, really, really, really need to stop hanging out with the people I hang out with. That ranges from Pip and Os, who are consistently shoving flutes into eachother’s vaginas, to my friends at school, who sexualize food and claim that palms can be erogenous zones. Mainly I need to get away from myself and my fear of little girls.

THE SPARKLES. THEY HURT.

I’ve decided that, just like Kuu squeals, Setsuna is way too cute. Thus, Kyoshiro should end with her. Her boobs and heart are both bigger than those of Kuu and she’s got green eyes (blue is sooo overrated). Most importantly, her voice is much sweeter and her blush is less ugly. Why should a sexy prince like Kyoshiro end with an ugly joshikousei (and remember kids, joshikousei = stupid) when an OHIME-SAMA like Setsuna is practically begging for him to fill her holes with his GARness?

YOU CAN’T HAVE YOUR CAKE AND FACEPLANT IN IT, TOO.

God, how the hell did she manage this one? I know klutzes when I see them but this is a bit extreme. Speaking of “a bit”…

5:32:53 PM lolikit: god and like with Kannazuki no Miko
5:33:01 PM lolikit: the OP animation tells the whole story in like 1.5 minutes
5:33:13 PM lolikit: with like main characters stabbing eachother and stuff
5:33:18 PM onii-sama: wow
5:33:22 PM onii-sama: the op gives away the plot?
5:33:25 PM onii-sama: that’s a bit much!
5:33:34 PM lolikit: hahaha calling it a plot is a bit much

HE BLEW HIS LOAD IN HER FACE

So, Kannazuki no Miko had flute rape and Strawberry Panic has girl-girl spooning, and what does this show have? Bukkake apparently. I won’t object; bukkake can be hot. Like when it’s Kyoshiro’s load that’s blown. I guess my mind’s a bit blown, too, though. I wouldn’t have imagined that someone as bishie as Kyoshiro was capable of having the machinery, much less the ability to fire it.

“AH! KUU!”

Well, he seems pleased with the transaction. She’s pleased, too, of course. Who wouldn’t want to be come on by Kyoshiro-sama?! He’s a mother-fucking prince, yo!

I’M SHOWING FANSERVICE AGAIN, MY PRINCE.

I don’t know why I’m showing fanservice again, my prince. I guess my humor’s just dame-dame, my prince. God fucking damn it, my prince, Kuu’s getting on my nerves, my prince. She needs to fucking stay clean, my prince. Kyoshiro detests filthiness, my prince. Shut up and swallow, my prince. … oh, and nonipple is NOT HOT. Btw, solution to getting dirty: WEAR YOUR SUSPENDERS, WHORE!

“I’M DEPRESSED THAT KYOSHIRO ISN’T FUCKING SETSUNA SENSELESS CONSTANTLY!”

Worry no longer, Kuu! He is!

…

Wow. I can only imagine just how overwhelmed Kuu’s puny brain was by this brief kiss. I don’t need to imagine to know how wet my pants are. Hot damn, more lezzing out in the bathtub, please? Kyoshiro approves?

“I CAME?”

I can’t say that this show is too het anymore, can I? I mean, Setsuna freakin’ YFR’d Kuu in the bath. It’s like Kenjou and Momomi, all over again.

GOD THE YURI OF IT ALL

I can’t deal with it anymore. They both need cocks in their mouths right now. This instant. Preferably girlcocks but any cock is fine. The yuri is overpowering. I never thought I’d say this but MORE HET PLEASE RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW.

WHAT THE FUCK ARE THEY DOING TO HER, CRUCIFIXION IN SAUNA?

In all honesty, the Chikane torture was more than a bit much. It was disgusting in the same way as Precia’s child-abuse in Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha was disgusting. It’s just gratuitously yucky. And unfortunate. We get the idea that Chikane’s being punished; they don’t need to do this to her on screen. The scenes of Chikane’s torture were, in my opinion, simply atrocious. Is this some kind of divine payback for YFRing Himeko in Kannazuki no Miko? If so, I don’t approve. Isn’t it enough that she was locked in the Moon Cave for like, eternity?

FUCKING BITCH FUCKING BITCH FUCKING BITCH

I am no longer a fan of heterochromia. Fucking bitch overstayed her allowance and now she’s going to pay by receiving my hate. Fucking bitch can’t get away with doing that to my Chikane. Fucking bitch is going to get raped by Himeko, or USSR, or something, sooner or later. Too bad Chikane doesn’t have many friends. I’d like to see the resulting doujinshi.

WHAT A WAY TO RECEIVE A BENTOU.

I approve. If only every time in a harem anime, when the osananajimi character presents the weak lead with a lunch box, he swept her off her feet and went tongue-to-tongue instead of stammering and scratching his head. Now if only this were a yuri harem show and it was a girl presenting a girl with a lunch box and two girls going tongue-to-tongue. Better yet, little girls. Like, 8 years old. Yeah, my striking range has lowered once more. Takamachi Nanoha is definitely past her prime.

HAHAHAH UMA GA TONDERU

JIGOKU E.

TSUGI WA… OTANOSHIMINI