Read the post here.

… where should I start? I’ve been kind of strapped for material lately. There isn’t much drama to write about that I’m aware of, save for ODEX, and that’s been covered to death by our beloved Singaporean compadres. Besides, I have no intelligent way to deal with the issue, as noted by Konoe. Notdotq has never been only about the loliyuri, and it’s certainly never been a site dedicated to episode reviews. Since I recommenced anime blogging earlier this month, I have not written anything on par with my 10-page rants about Higurashi no Naku Koro ni. I thrive on controversy and drama.

In short, I’ve been looking for something to write about. So I follow Impz’s advice, and, sure enough—I’ve got something to write about.

Step One was easy to accomplish; I check ANO several times daily and enjoy the time I spend reading the blogs of accomplished folks like DrmChsr0, Seth Johnson, and the whole team at THAT.

Step Two was also easy—I sleep ridiculous amounts, often heading for bed around 8 PM PST.

Step Three? I immerse myself in anime music like no one’s business. It’s disgusting, really, seeing how bad the stuff is.

Step Four is a bit harder to feel good about saying I’ve completed. I rarely watch anime these days, dwindling down to 1-3 hours per week from my old 20. But yeah, I watch anime. Enough to post about. Besides, anime isn’t at stake here—it’s the drama, the controversy, the community that I knew and still love. It’s about ANO.

And here, my dear readers, is where shit hits the proverbial fan: STEP FIVE.

I go to Colloquy and hit command+1 to access my connection list. I select irchighway, and click “connect.” Once connected, after being bombarded with Growl notifications regarding my network status, I click “join room,” and type in “animeblogger.”

Those were the steps I took to complete Step Five. Perhaps I didn’t put my all into it, perhaps I didn’t pour my reiatsu into it, perhaps I need more training… but the result was utter failure.

I did not get inspired.

I did not talk to anyone in the Animeblogger.net IRC channel.

In fact, I didn’t even enter the channel, as far as the end user experience is concerned.

Oh, sure, Colloquy told me I was “kicked,” and to be “kicked” one must first enter the channel, but that one message was the only bit of text I got out of the Animeblogger.net IRC channel. My dreams of being inspired, shattered. Kicked on join. Rejected. That’s right, folks: I’m on someone’s shit list.

Well, maybe Impz’s advice wasn’t so far off. I’m posting, aren’t I?

I am.

I’m posting. I’m posting with questions. I’m posting with questions for the community.

Colloquy told me that I am “banned for spamming,” when I’ve set foot in that channel twice in my life. The first time, I was ushered in by Impz, or Retsgip, or someone like them, urging me to go to “where the cool conversations were being held.” The second time, I asked a silent channel full of anime bloggers, all of whose nicks I recognized as the nicks of buddies in the community, why none of them cared to join in on the (at the time) lively discussion in this community’s—Animenano’s—IRC channel.

This isn’t like Jason banning me from his crap site.

I have no backing of any kind, and there is no clear enemy. This isn’t a representative of ANO vs. a representative of despotism. My absence and recently-acquired anime-watching impotence dictate that I am no longer the same person in relation to ANO as I was three months ago. As for Animeblogger.net… you’re all on ANO. You were all in the ANO IRC channel three months ago. We were all comrades.

This isn’t like Jason banning me from AOMM. This is something entirely different, and I don’t understand it. I play the omniscient sometimes, it’s true, and I’ve been known to utter the famous catchphrase “my taste in anime is impeccable,” but not now. No, sir. I’m no longer on home turf. I’m facing fucking Johnny Rebs here, and they’re pwning me in the ass. Johnny Rebs done in the style of dudes in rennai games—they’ve got impenetrable shadows covering their faces, and I can’t make out who it is who’s just shoved his cock into me.

So. Why?

And how? And, for a little extra spice, “quoi?”

I’ve been out of the loop—am I no longer in Hung’s favor? Am I no longer as prominent a member of ANO as I used to be? Am I no longer a “member of the community?” When I returned, many of you welcomed me back with laughs or scorn, but never disregard. You seemed to remember who I was, O ye who were around before I quit in November.

Is Animeblogger.net so separate that our communities no longer mesh fully? Is ANO no longer the community it once was, but now solely a tool of aggregation like Blogsuki?

What infractions have I committed, save for losing face before DarkMirage? I’m known to be an idiot from time to time. I’m just a kid; many of you don’t believe that I’m as young as I am. For a long time, it seemed that I had secured a place in the community. I can accept needing to rebuild a reputation after discarding a persona, but being punished?

That’s not what anime blogging is about, friends.

If any of you who frequent the AB.net IRC channel want to talk to me, I’m still around in ANO’s channel on Rizon. I’m not trying to suck people away from AB.net—I’m making myself available as it seems I shall not be rejoining AB.net’s IRC channel for a while to come. Or shall I? That’s another question you my readers may be able to answer.

Impz’s post is great. It’s mainly comprised of good advice, and you’d all do well to follow it. I’m in no way criticizing his ideas when I say that his guide failed me. It is not Impz who failed me, but rather some greater, more expansive power, that has interfered in the Western Hemisphere.