importance and focus ← ¬.Q

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importance and focus

For five months now, I’ve been blogging anime. I’ve ranted, raved, and made an absolute fool of myself. I did a lot of things- went to Fanime and wore that sign, signed up for Blogsuki and got rejected, made some buddies among the anime blogging community, was one of the first to join animenano, created the #animenano channel and operated it, brought Jason-hate to the channel and cajoled Dream Chaser into making the first anti-Jason graph post, became known on Hinano’s stats for liking the word ‘yuri’, skyped with MrPippers and KonoSono gang (and YY, but fuck him), and, of course, got myself made fun of a lot by wonderful people such as jpmeyer, Seth, and Hung himself.

From time to time, amongst all this, I might have mentioned “my site” in casual conversation a few times. I think most people took this to mean notdotq, as it is the site of mine that they know. But that’s all wrong. notdotq isn’t anything important to me. It’s not “my site”, it’s “my anime blog”, and it’s a tiny fraction of what I’m interested in maintaining. Over time, I realized I was getting more response from anime blogging, that this community is engaged and ever-enthusiastic, that there’s never a shortage of things to be said or a shortage of ways in which to respond to those. I realized that one post on notdotq could ellicit more reaction than months of work on “my site”, and because I’m a bit of an attention whore I let notdotq slide to the forefront of my activities.

Somewhere along the way, I went from five shows in a season to twenty six, and I’m currently watching thirty five or something.

In short, since starting notdotq, anime has consumed me.

Now, that’s not a bad thing. If I’ve talked to any of you about this before, you’ll know I have a reason to want to be consumed by anime. It’s not “something I must do!” or “my dream!!” , but it helps me get by. Immersion. I get to avoid thinking about unpleasant things when I’m dumbing myself down with anime. Unpleasant things like the fact that I’m dumbing myself down with anime.

Any of you who know more about me than “oh, lolikit? he has an oniitama who might be /be friends with jason and another brother who’s an IM at chess, and he’s not really a lolicon, and he’s a bratty sixteen year old yuri fetishist” will know that for the longest time, when signing up on internet forums, I’d put in the interests field: writing, drawing

When I started “my site”, that expanded to include internet. And soon, it became a lie not to start the list with anime. Truth is, if I’m ever talking to anyone, and they’re like, “so what do you like doing in your free time?” I can’t say writing because I rarely write anymore. I can’t say drawing because I rarely draw anymore. Oh sure, they’re things I love to do and want to do and enjoy doing- I just rarely do them anymore.

I’m going to see about regaining what truly made my life what it was before I gave into escapism. I’m going to try to change that nasty fact that entertaining people with crappy humor on an internet blog is the only thing I’m remotely good at.

I’m definitely going to keep watching Strawberry Panic, so that I can keep blogging it, because it would suck if notdotq ended right here without a fully blogged series. I’m going to keep watching a handful of other shows as well, but I think I’ll kill a good deal of what I’m watching. I’m also probably ONLY going to blog Strawberry Panic- unless something important pops up and I feel the need to address it here.

Eh, I don’t mean to be so dramatic about it all. Basically, I have things that mean more to me than anime, and I want to cut back on the time going into the anime to be able to spend time doing those things I care more about. I’m focusing on something more important, and notdotq will most likely be less vibrant than it once was.

I’m not going to say anything rash like “I’m going to quit watching anime” because there’s no way I can.

Oh, and jpmeyer, if you comment on this saying “fuck anime. I want to live.” … well, I might just go ballistic.

it is moist & delicious meta

and it's not even a lie!

lolikitsune penned this last love song at 14:30 on July 24, 2006.

It's categorized as Commentary, and it's tagged over nine thousand things, including: . What a slut.

At least it only has 19 comments and 1,268 views.

19 Responses

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At 4:26 pm on July 24, 2006,
Os said:

“Fook Yoo? Fook Me!” Dont forget this as it will help in the future.
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At 4:54 pm on July 24, 2006,
tj han said:

Yes it’s time to live. Unfortunately for some, anime is life.

And yes, I’m no longer doing anything other than buying figurines, talking anime and watching anime. This is mildly disturbing but highly entertaining. I look back at my younger days, wasting tme hanging out at the mall with moans of “life is boring” and I look at me now, forever rushing to do more stuff, I can see which one is ironically the more productive one in spite of its negative labels.
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At 5:42 pm on July 24, 2006,
Lupus said:

If you think there’s something wrong with your life, and you’re going to make an attempt to change it for the better, I give you props. The most difficult thing is to admit that there is something wrong with your current lifestyle, the next is to make a resolution to change it and carry it out.

I’ll miss your posts though.
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At 6:16 pm on July 24, 2006,
lolikitsune said:

Eh, I can probably get out some posts without devoting so much time to anime.

My main goal is basically time redistribution. It’s not that drastic if you think of it like that.
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At 8:29 pm on July 24, 2006,
Hung said:

>>Oh, and jpmeyer, if you comment on this saying ‚Äúfuck anime. I want to live." ‚Ä¶ well, I might just go ballistic.

I’m not jpmeyer, so can I say it? Ah, forget it.
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At 12:41 am on July 25, 2006,
Anga said:

I have noticed same thing too and because of that gradually decreased how much I watch anime. I guess it’s kind of self defence, I’m now following 14-15 series and that’s still too much. There is no way that I could blog more than few shows since watching alone takes so much time, my lack of passion toward anime nowadays have probably saved me from worst.
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At 5:13 am on July 25, 2006,
helspectre said:

HEY YOU FUCKER!

who’s gonna bitch with me when yur less active?!

get your ass submerged in anime!
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At 7:13 am on July 25, 2006,
kacpy said:

This was deep.
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At 7:29 am on July 25, 2006,
lolikitsune said:

If you guys take a look at my anime list, you’ll see that most of what I’m watching now is from Spring or before (like Ergo Proxy…) and that I’m not really watching many shows from this season. I’d be done with more than half of what I’m watching if subs were timely >_<
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At 7:55 am on July 25, 2006,
Corydorf said:

I know the feeling. I’m kinda feeling it too, like I might be spending a bit too much time on anime, and not enough on other stuff.
So I’ve backed off a bit myself. I’m trimming away bad series, and saving my money. I won’t stop watching, I’ve tried before, but I keep coming back to it.
For me, anime is entertainment, not life. I watch it to relax, to laugh, or to think.
I don’t ever want it to take over my main intrests, or to become such a part of my life that I can’t do without it.
Which is not to say that I like it any less, but I’m pretty sure I get exactaly what you mean loli.
(except you don’t mention me, you heartless bastard :P)
Do what you want to do. Anime is not your life, but it is a part of it. Treat it accordingly, but don’t forget about us, and all those who love to read your blog.
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At 9:46 am on July 25, 2006,
lolikitsune said:

I’m fairly sure it’s a feeling most people as involved in anime as we have had at least once. I’ve had it this whole time, I just decided it’s time to do something about it, no matter how small whatever I’m doing about it is. And if that means cutting series like Witchblade from my watch list, how much can it hurt?

Oh, and sorry for not mentioning you, Cory. I didn’t mention a lot of people, though. This wasn’t meant to be a “plug the rest of the anime blogging community” post…
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At 7:31 pm on July 25, 2006,
Tess said:

I remember when I tried to keep the anime I watched at time to about three series at the beginning of the year, since I wanted to focus more on school…
… Then the spring season hit, and that idea was long lost. Not to mention most of my summer has been a complete waste of time.

You inspire me to finally do the things I should be doing. Like… art homework. *looks at her anime list to decide what to get rid of*
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At 7:49 pm on July 25, 2006,
lolikitsune said:

Inspire? Me?

Surely you have the wrong blog. Let me point you to where you should go for inspiration.
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At 9:35 pm on July 25, 2006,
Tess said:

Haha, of course, jason is an inspiration indeed. Wasn’t born yesterday. ;)
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At 1:57 am on July 26, 2006,
helspectre said:

glad to see your hatred burning strong.
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At 8:14 am on July 26, 2006,
lolikitsune said:

I wouldn’t be me if I weren’t constantly bashing Jason. Hell, Anime Nano wouldn’t be Anime Nano if I weren’t constantly bashing Jason. Ya know what I mean?
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At 8:43 pm on July 28, 2006,
jiv said:

Erm… what did that jason cat did? I mean, I read blogs ocassionally, and the only thing I know is that jason runs blog suki… Other than that, well, I spend more time worring about anime comments that the struggles between bloggers and well… I’n just curious.
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At 11:33 pm on July 28, 2006,
lolikitsune said:

I’m just being a bitch about nothing. Don’t worry about it, it’s not important.
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