I have figured out what’s wrong with Strawberry Panic. Every character in it is a fucking dumbass, except for Chikaru, who’s too busy with her cosplay fetish to be stupid. When Kenjou and Momomi throw Nagisa into the stage set and it breaks, why the hell does Nagisa apologize? Why the hell don’t the other people on stage start beating the hell out of those idiot Spica bitches?

Spica fucking sucks.

Unlike Nagisa in this costume. It’s really awesome. Now if only Mr. Shizuma would lose her mantle.

So Nagisa and co. are setting up for the play, and some idiot (Rokujou) decides that they shouldn’t rehearse until the day before the play. Great idea! The props break and the sound effects idiots are smelling the roses, and Kenjou and Momomi decide to harass everyone by being idiotic bitches with no teamwork. Kakashi-sensei would tell them that they’re hyakunen hayai before HSBing Asuma-sensei. When Nagisa confronts them and asks them to be civil like a good little Tokiha Mai wannabe, they throw her aside, wrecking the set, and giving everyone another dozen hours of work to do before the play.

They end up rehearsing the morning of, and, of course, shit goes wrong when they put on their performance.

Like Amane-senpai tripping and Chikaru spraining her ankle.

ggnorekthxbai

Nagisa steps up and takes Chikaru’s role, thereby donning the best outfit she’s worn this series, and has a nice little “gwehehehe I don’t love Etoile-sama” moment on stage, before being run through by said Etoile-sama. Mr. Shizuma should have used her other sword, though. The one that’s not a prop, the one in her pants.

The episode has a happy ending, and I’m wondering to myself, why the hell did they spend two episodes on this fucking play? It wasn’t well done, it wasn’t gripping, it wasn’t even marginally interesting. There was no character development. Nagisa’s still a whiny bitch. Tamao and Yaya are still Himemiya Chikane wannabes. Etoile-sama is still Mr. Shizuma, futa playboy lolicon of Ichigo-sha. Kenjou and Momomi are still trying to be evil and still failing to have any impact. Hikari and Amane still hold the place of “most secure relationship.”

And they’re all still fucking idiots.

Except for Chikaru. ’cause she’s an awesome cosplay fetishist.